Connecting Reading to Real Life
Yesterday, I was taking my 13-year-old
grandson to an away soccer game which gave us that momentously valuable
opportunity for a car-ride conversation.
Anyone who loves a child knows that sometimes the best conversations can
happen in the midst of everyday activities when we are not eye-to-eye.
I wanted to discuss a bullying scene
from a movie we had been watching just before we left, and I asked him what he
would have done if he had seen the same thing happen at his school. “Gramma,” he said. “It’s fake!
It’s only a movie.” I was struck
once again with the difficulty we have as parents and educators helping kids
connect to what they read, or in this case, view. It’s the difference between merely seeing the
picture and internalizing what that picture means in terms of being human.
Readers may already know
that helping kids connect the text and their outside experiences is a tough
challenge. But, much more important than
mere reading comprehension is the need for a child to connect with what he or
she reads or views simply because empathy is a significant life-long success
factor. The best leaders, (as well as
spouses, friends, and parents), have the ability to understand the patterns of
human behavior and what motivates others.
In addition, people who connect with others and feel empathy are better
able to withstand adversity. Connecting with others provides a feeling of belonging
and reduces feelings of loneliness.
Typically, our students connect to the events in a story or a
show, and if they have never experienced that particular series of events
themselves, they have difficulty imagining themselves in the same situation. Our job as teachers and parents is to help
children move beyond the situation itself and explore the elements of human
nature embedded within. This human
connection can come from connecting with pictures in magazines, television,
books, and movies. It involves
considering what the people are thinking and feeling, and why. It involves asking kids important
questions about what they read and view.
Try this out with your child. Use
the picture below and ask a few questions such as: How did the boy get into this jam? [You don’t want the obvious: ‘He put his head
through the chair.’ Rather, and answer such as, 'Maybe
someone dared him to do it.' Or, ' Maybe he was
showing off for his friends.'] What is the
boy thinking? [He might be
embarrassed because everyone knows he did something foolish. He might be afraid of getting in
trouble. He might be afraid of getting
hurt.] What do think is going through the mind of the lady in the tan jacket? [She might be afraid … She might be angry …] How about the man in blue with the saw?
Any example
of human experience will do, but if you’re game there is an incredible video on
youtube.com at “Sailor Surprises His Son.” After viewing, ask your child: If the boy is happy, why is he crying? How does the father feel? Why do you think the surprise was a good one?
Even our littlest readers and viewers can begin to connect to what they
read, hear, and view with practice. Good
connection questions help us draw conclusions about people in general. They help us understand jealousy, loyalty, shyness,
embarrassment, and a whole wealth of feelings humans share in common. They also enable us to understand reactions
which are not common to most people.
Next time you’re reading a story or watching a movie, ask your children
to think about whether or not they would like to be friends with a particular
character or person. Ask them what they
might have done in that same situation, if they would like to visit that place
or to meet that person you read about.
Ask which part of the story or movie they liked best, if one of the
characters reminds them of anyone they know... and, of course, always ask why.
